Bears Repeating. "Calibrate Your Selfishness."

The issue isn't selfishness. 
The issue is selfishness out of balance. 

Too much selfishness and then everything is about you. That's not good for you or the rest of us.
Too little selfishness, like the impossible goal of "selflessness" and then nothing is about you. That means there's no you left for the rest of us.

Spend time as a group thinking about how a healthy, awakened view of self-interest as well as others-interest might be exactly what you need to live the life God intended.


LEADER NOTE: It's rare that I (Steve) change a visual metaphor between services. But this Sunday I did. First hour I drew a tick and "heaven" (heaven to describe God) as two ends of a continuum. But there was a lot I was leaving out for the sake of time. Unhappy with the result, I compressed it some to ensure it was as helpful as possible. A seeming subtle change but a change nonetheless, I drew a tick on one end and a human being to describe, from left to right, what we aren't and everything we can be. If you have people in your group who turn out to have gone to first and others to second and third, there will be doe variance in how I described the way selfishness scales. Second service was the one that made it to the podcast, so maybe listen to it ahead of time if you need to hear the difference. 


Thaw

• Who is someone you know that gives of themselves?

• What in your estimate allows them or drives them to be like this?

• What most stayed with you from Sunday?

Read

• Phil 2:1-8 

• Thoughts?

Leader Note: some interesting discussion is sure to come when you explore the nuances of some of the original language here. Have the group to consider the passage again if necessary in light of the meaning of these words:  Selfish ambition (Greek is eritheia) “One who has a desire to put one's self forward, a partisan and fractious spirit which does not disdain low arts” (low arts as in manipulating others through the use of sham, trickery and false kindness. "Conceit" (Greek is kenodoxia) literally translates "empty glory" or glory without any good reason other than the desiring of it. Verse 5 reads "Have this mind" Mind here is the Greek phroneō, which is not an achieved state of being or natural process of thinking but a mutually adopted set of decisions we have to keep making again and again.

• Paul is describing something that takes real effort and transformation. What shifts would have to take place in you regarding how you relate to others if you were going to follow what Paul says?

• What makes you decide to be more selfish, or more others-centered?

Read

• Matthew 9:35-36

• Thoughts?

• The word "compassion" is “splagchnon" in Greek, which refers to Jesus' guts. This is a very visual way of describing the visceral sense of connection Jesus has with others when he sees others in need. He can literally feel it. What kinds of things stir you to act on others behalf?

• Are there examples of where you have stopped allowing this stirring to motivate you to serve others, such as busyness, doubt about what difference it would make, etc?

Apply

• How can this group help its members to be honest about selfishness out of scale?

• How can it help its members understand how to balance self-interest and the interests of others in a way that upholds the high calling of those who follow the Christ?