That Stuff That Floats:

This discussion will be in large part the group functioning as the church. Many people only ever hear their pastors talk about important things, but they never have someone they trust speak these things into them, remind them of who they are and really do the "life with" part.
This may be a turn of the page where your group's growth and maturation is concerned. Not because the questions and insights are that good, but because you can decide that you are going to really figure out what it means to walk together and remind each other who you are in light of the resurrected Christ.


Thaw
*We did a stress rest last week. As we think about how insane things can get this time of year, let's spend just a moment and do it again. How is our stress level and what are we doing that is healthy?

Leader note: If every member of the group is sharing a busy schedule, a lack of rhythm and a sense of bad living, it would be a great use of your time (and a great way to really shepherd) to spend five minutes in quiet. Depending on your environment, you can close your eyes and do nothing, you could quietly read something like psalm 40 to yourselves, you could write out a prayer. Don't forget to lead your group through what it actually is, rather than going through the motions and missing it!

*What most stuck with you from Sunday?
*Why?
*Who is it that reminds you of who you are and helps you feel connected to the greater story?

Leader note: if they say nobody, or just their spouse, you may want to consider that an invitation in the next few months to create more of an environment of mutual support, challenge and relating outside the group time.

Read
*Luke 24:13-35
*Thoughts?

Read
*2 Cor 5:17-19
*1 Peter 1:3
*Thoughts?

*There is a theme that Jesus wants to give us a living hope that death, disappointment, pain and setbacks aren't final? What would this concept have to do with continuing to "move"?
*Why is walking a metaphor for our faith?
*Why is the cessation of movement a metaphor for hopelessness?

Discuss
*What are specific ways and for what reasons do we stop walking?
*From the answers to the previous question, is there a common theme regarding that which seems to suck the hope out of us and render us motionless?
*What gets us going again?
*How do we make sure the answer to the previous question is in place?

Leader note: time might have been an answers. And so is people. But few of us have any intentional time or trusted others in or life to make that happen. You might use this moment, gently, to see how your group can be more of this for your members.

*Respond as a group to this quote:

"Hope, for the Christians, is not wishful thinking or blind optimism. It is a mode of knowing, a mode within which new things are possible, options are not shut down, new creation can happen." -NT Wright, Surprised by Hope.

Apply
*True hope comes down to trusting that Jesus, starting with death and working backward into even our smallest woes, has something life-giving to say to us. How does hope in resurrection and redemption of all things speak to you?
*As you heard the previous question, what did your cynicism and despair whisper to you?
*What would your life look like if you fully acknowledged what your cynicism was trying to drag you into, and yet you lived by hope anyway?. Be as specific to your real and particular circumstances as you can.

Closing meditation
*Spend a few moments celebrating the birth of Christ by acknowledging that God continues to tell us he's not finished in his giving of himself to sinners. Then commit John 11:25 to memory, noting that it doesn't promise the avoidance of pain, but routes us through it to ultimate redemption.

That Stuff That Floats: Naivety Scene

Use not only your particular night, but this season, to allow the Spirit of Resurrection to spark some hope in the members of your group.
Some hopes are alive and well, while other hopes are not really hopes at all anymore. They're distant memories of a simpler, more naive season that gave way to cynicism and "reality".

But the birth of Christ, like the resurrection of Christ, point to the story not being over yet!

Thaw

• On a scale of 1-10, 10 being the need for hospitalization and 0 being completely chilled out, where are you with stress right now?
• Why?
• What causes or changes that, especially in December?
• How can this group help you or be helped by you?

• What stuck with you from Sunday?

Read

• Genesis 1:1-3
• Thoughts?
• How does this story speak to our individual lives beyond a telling of the origins of the universe?

Read

• Thoughts?
• 1 Corinthians 13:13
• Why are these three lumped together? What do they have to do with each other in the context of being a loving, healthy community?

Read

• 1 Peter 1:3
• Thoughts?
• What does Christ conquering death have to do with how we live our lives at work, as members of a family, a nation, how we handles things being difficult or seemingly impossible?
• Why do we separate issues and circumstances that apply to resurrection and hope, and those that are untouched and so require our worry, despair and giving up?

Discuss

• What are some of things that you have remained hopeful about in your life? What is it that works against this hope? How often do you pray about it and talk through it with others?
• What are some things that you used to hope for and stopped? What changed?

Leader note: It may be a childhood hope that parents would stay married, but ultimately didn't, or a death of a loved one. In these cases, hoping can sometimes turn into an unhealthy lack of acceptance in the grieving process. You may want to ask what good has come, or can potentially come, from things like this in the past that didn't go at all like they had wished. Not that the past can be changed, but how might we search for beauty in it. Ask questions like: How is God resurrecting the broken pieces? What have you learned from it? How can we find good in it, and use those circumstances to catalyze beauty in our own lives? What is that part of our story still trying to do positively if we'll let it?

• Considering what it was like to hope and wait on the other side of Jesus being born, what does the birth of Christ say to our sense of despair?
• In what ways do we feel attached to our cynicism and feel like despair is something to cling to?

Leader note: The idea here is an insistence to not get hurt or look like a naive idiot. We want to hope, but we won't because we're certain that it leaves us unnecessarily vulnerable for taking some kind of emotional, social, psychological hit. See if the group is willing to explore that part of the problem of hope is that it just feels childish. Remember, the Kingdom belongs in many respects to the mentality of children! (Matthew 19:14)

Apply

Chew on these ideas as a group:

• Hoping is an act of Creativity
• Hoping is an act of Love
• Hoping is not "Denial"
• Hoping makes your past your prologue.

• How can the group help you this December, and beyond, with nurturing even the smallest hope that the story isn't over yet?

Leader note: Remember, trying to fix or quote single Bible verses to people not willing yet to entertain hope is harmful and makes hope less appealing, as it will seem to be the currency of fools. Hoping with people is a gentle process of asking better questions with people about circumstances, and, as we will see in the next message, reminding people that they are more than the sum total of their pasts and regrets.

You Already Are.

For this discussion time, consider trying something a little different.
Obviously the generic discussion makers (found on the lower right hand side of the Group Leader Site itself) can prove handy for taking the discussion forward.. Beyond that, here's an idea to consider:

After a couple of ice breaker questions, have the group read the entire book of Philippians. There are a few ways to do it- choose the way that best suits the personality, maturity and tenure of your particular LifeGroup.

1. Have each member read the whole letter to themselves quietly.
2. Have one person read the whole letter aloud for the group.
3. Have 4 people read it aloud, a chapter each.

You might also consider providing paper and pens, or even one large sheet and a marker, for each person to write down the one word or phrase that they feel like best captures a chapter or the whole book. This is a great way to generate discussion and meditation as each person writes down the thing that resonates with them personally and allows the group to see it.

•After the reading, allow people time to discuss and ask about certain phrases and ideas that seemed to jump out at them.
•Prod the group to compare Paul's thoughts with some of our presuppositions about Christian faith.
•Allow your group to share what they feel confused, conflicted and convicted about.
•See if your group can understand Paul through a lens of a once-anxious persecutor of Christ-followers to a now peace-filled, content follower himself. He actually has less comforts WITH Christ than he did without him. And yet, from prison, discovers the "secret" he (and we!) had been after all along.

Be mindful that this may be the most Bible reading some of your members have ever done. It may also be some of the deeper thinking they have done. Pay close attention, as the leader, to how this goes and how you might incorporate this kind of exercise into your group again in the future.

Thaw
•What about Sunday morning most stuck with you?
•What is/was your initial reaction to the idea that you already have happiness within you?
•How does pursuing fulfillment result in losing it?
•What is different between us and others or previous generations when it comes to true happiness?
•What does one do with this idea in order to benefit from it?

Leader note: help the group understand that by simply becoming more aware, or as has been said in recent weeks, awaking, happiness is realized. But it isn't made or created by going out and finding it "out there". Discuss for as long as your group likes the idea that true contentment is such that Jesus is teaching us is already true in our life, not just an achieved potential.

Read
•The Book of Philippians.

Me Two Three

"Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power."
~Lao-Tzu~


We all know it intuitively; there is a gap between what I am and perceive superficially, and what is really banging around at the depths. People throughout time and all over the world have come to the same conclusion- one must take getting honest and facing his or her real self seriously.
Yet Christians, though invited through Christ to tune into the Source of Life himself, are often no more self-aware, awake and mindful than anyone else.

Take some time in your group context to see if you can, as a group, begin to take steps into a world non-anxious, unthreatened, uncriticizing awareness of what you really are.
You should encourage people to speak honestly about themselves, about how they have perceived the others in the group, and encourage them not to defend or flee from getting insights in your time.

It's tough work. But it's necessary in order to mean, with integrity, every word in the phrase " 'I' have a relationship with Jesus".

Thaw
•What is this group's thanksgiving plan?

•What is something you used to do or think, until you realized it just wasn't true to you? 
•What is something you have learned was always true about yourself that, for whatever reason, you wouldn't entertain before? What do you think changed?
•What most stuck with you Fromm Sunday morning?

Read
•Matthew 7:1-3
Thoughts?
•Often, we think of this as the proper procedure for judging: make sure your eye is clear and then pounce. Instead, discuss the principle Jesus is articulating regarding true sight and our impulse to focus outside of ourselves. What are some examples of how you have preferred to deal with others' junk to your own?
•What if you don't see anything in your "own eye"? Does that mean there's nothing there? Explain.

Read
•Ephesians 4:17-25
•Thoughts?
•What would you say the emphasis is on and why?

Leader note: you may want to point out that much of Christianity is thought to be about the confrontation with the foolishness Paul is describing. But here, as in other places, Paul's chief concern is about followers of Jesus actually being different, rather than merely confronting people with ideas that are different. And that true difference is about being awake, wise, seeing, light and numerous other metaphors for actually being aware and sensitive to what I actually am. While others who do not know God ("Gentiles") think they are the sum total of their impulses, we are invited to be deeply, mindfully different.

Read
•Romans 12:1-3
•Thoughts?
•Throughout the rest of this chapter, there isn't any mention of controlling or fixating on the lives of other people. It's about how we ourselves behave and knowing what's actually going on within ourselves. Soberly aware. Why would a person choose to bypass sober self-assessment and go on to try and change people?

Discuss
•What kids of people and circumstances do we normally avoid? Why?
•How might God want to use what we've avoided in order to awaken us to ourselves?
•How does discomfort serve to "crucify" the false parts of our self so that we can be stripped down to what we actually are?

•How does a group assist in someone discovering themselves?
•How can a group hinder someone discovering themselves?

Leader note: the idea is the safety to think differently, to be interested in things others don't understand, and the freedom to even be wrong. Ay environment that has criticism, or the potential for reality to be something someone can't take, creates a divide in a person where they must not acknowledge their true self, since that self is shameful.

•What can this group do as a practice for the members to have the ability to know themselves?

Me Too Two

We all have a person or group that we want nothing to do with, while at the same time we would affirm that our great God loves everyone or he doesn't love anyone at all.
Spend some time as a group teasing out the idea that what feels like strength (making sure we catalog people in various degrees of closeness to ourselves based on their beliefs and associated behaviors) might actually be our inability to deal with reality.

Don't forget to then ask God as a group for His Spirit, where true Life and Strength for this and everything else come from!


Thaw

• When have you been ousted?
• When have you ousted?
• What most stuck with you from Sunday morning?

Read

• Romans 5:8
• Matthew 28:20
• Thoughts?
• What do you discern is true about human beings once they become, in the very least, aware of Jesus?
• What do you suspect Jesus being "with us always" (without any disclaimer about us remaining worth his presence, mind you) says about how he views relationships?
• The ministry and death of Christ were all to restore a loved world to himself, even though that world hadn't merit on it's own. The spirit was given for his continual presence with us. Why do you think so many faithful people turn all this into another way of separating themselves from the unwanted?

Leader note: Think of John 3:16, and how much mess comes with lumping everything together in "the world". And yet, with full knowledge of that mess, he gave himself. This gets more amazing the more you think about it, and the more you realize just how messy humans have always been!

Read

• 1 Cor 3:16
• Rom 8:11
• Thoughts?
• What does this say about the relational resources that are available to us.

Leader note: You may want to help the group understand the Holy Spirit is the Spirit of Jesus. It's not a different personality than Christ, but the same (reference Acts 16 to see an example of the interchangeableness of terms). That is to say that the same Jesus who ate and lived with the rejected and forgotten, referred to people not as evil or bad but as blind, sick and lost, now inhabits us collectively and calls us church. His spirit contended, in love, with so much foolishness, sin and even violence toward himself; and we have his spirit, providing us the ability to do, in various measure, the same.

Discuss

• What do you remember about the idea that most religion is rooted in a philosophy that begins with beliefs, then associated behaviors and then rewards, subsequently, with belonging?
• What do you remember about what happens when you reverse the order?

Leader note: it might be helpful to remind the group again that beginning with "belonging" is how life works. We all, ideally, belong as babies before we believe or behave a thing. It seems to be the natural order to belong first. But starting with "beliefs" creates yet another meritocracy, and instills an anxiety about keeping the state of belonging by way of good and right beliefs and behaviors (whether you actually do them or not is another story....you do whatever it takes, truthfully or not, to remain included!). Starting with belonging is FAR MESSIER because you are saying that the default is inclusion, regardless of beliefs or behaviors. This takes longer, more resources and is harder to measure for effectiveness, (Think how quickly you could measure success during the Inquisition!) but the miracle in knowing that love is unconditional, even in the midst of negative consequences for certain behaviors, is known to transform hearts.

Apply

• How does this impact life with your family?
• Extended family?
• Co-workers and classmates?
• People groups?
• Different lifestyles?
• Belief systems?

• Why do many of us unconsciously assume that we are included in grace, but others aren't or are less so?

Leader note: listen for a depiction of merit, or in the use of a selection of Bible verses that secures themselves in God's favor and not another. You may even want to discuss as a group Luke 18:9-14. If someone believes that they have followed a code or formula for getting grace, then they have turned grace into something else. If you ask about this, you may get push back that sounds like "so, it doesn't matter WHAT you do?!?" This extreme isn't the case at all, though it is evidence that for the person asking, a systematized theology is under the very terrifying threat of a very organic reality with which it rarely fits.

We all see as we mature that our lives, choices, beliefs and behaviors have an effect on everything we are and do. The point is simply this....none of this should affect our status as loved and belonging, or love was a poor summary for Christ to give. If the principles and ideas and actions are more important than the person, then the summary of God's will should have been "love the law with all your heart, soul, mind and strength, and love your neighbors that are verifiably worth it". If love for us from God is unconditional, and then we give conditional love due to our weakness, to others, we have short circuited God's will, not upheld it. Hard as it is to hear, and hard as it is to live, this is our weakness presenting itself as divinely sanctioned power. It is merely a variation on a theme that reduces love to a transaction.

• Why is it important to enter into both the difficulty of this discussion, and the difficulty of living this out, in the context of a loving, supportive community?
• What can happen if you try and unconditionally love a difficult someone on your own, especially if they are hurtful?
• Undoubtedly, people in this group have specific persons in mind when they think of the longterm difficulty of belonging first. How can this group, in the next few weeks, help create a plan for loving this person that engages them with the complimentary (not mutually exclusive) values of love and wisdom? Think about how you can each help each other in the weeks and months to come to be a source of loving power, verses and isolating source of withdrawal.

Me Too One

God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8

Before we were the type of people that you'd expect Pure Perfection himself to want to be around us...before we could point to anything in our selves or our lives and say "we're ready"... and even before we were aware enough of our shortcomings to even know to ask for forgiveness, the incarnation of God came and died at our hands.

Jesus came to once and for all abolish the meritocracy and to make his desire for us known.

It's hard to imagine, but while some just don't know this and therefore it doesn't inform how they love people- some have grown up knowing this and yet still treat people based on merit.

For the next few weeks, we will be simultaneously teaching a social philosophy that runs in the background at Crosspointe, and the way into relating to others that goes beyond a mere transaction with those who can pay.



Thaw

• What do you hope to accomplish in this group with the remaining 10 weeks of 2011?
• How is your time spent outside of group and Sunday mornings set to work along side that goal or against it?

• What has most stuck with you from Sunday morning?
• Who is someone that, in your lifetime, has embodied the philosophy of Me Too toward you? Share how.

Read

• Galatians 6:1-4
• Thoughts?

Leader note: it is certainly thought provoking to remember that this selection is at the tail end of Paul describing the tension between the Spirit and the Flesh. In chapter 5 he has just listed off words and phrases that paint selfishness, followed by the fruit (or the evidence) of the Spirit.
During Sundays teaching, this passage was read in the The Message translation.

• How would you describe the attitude Paul is insisting on?
• Who do yo know that is like this?
• What is it that happens and makes us unlike the picture Paul is painting here?

Leader note: help the group determine the pressures that makes us critical, arrogant and deluded into superiority. When it happens, we're often not choosing to be "mean" or "distant". In fact, we feel justified and could likely defend it. Who are the people and what are the circumstances when we tell ourselves Galatians 6:1-4 doesn't apply.

Discuss

• Describe the difference between an attitude of Me Too, and an attitude on Not Me.

Leader note: It may be helpful for your group's discussion to camp out in this idea for a while on two fronts. One, there is the basic sense of being with people in every way possible, regardless of how the behave or misbehave. But, perhaps more significantly, there is the difference between agreeing that the idea "Me Too" is beautiful and sounds good in a sermon and actually employing it with people that you have hated just last week at work or school. Like everything we learn as faithful people, we can't allow ourselves the simplicity of seeing if we agree. We have to go further and find out what it actually means to live it out in our very real lives.

• What kinds of issues and hurdles come to mind when you consider actually living out a Me Too attitude n your specific context?
• Imagine your family gathered, idealistically around the Thanksgiving table in a few weeks. What faces come to the forefront of your mind when you think of someone denying you for a past decision? How about the faces that you have denied for something they have done or are doing?

Read

• Luke 7:33-34
• Thoughts
• It appears Jesus is painting a picture of a certain kind of piety that always finds a way to stand against, rather than with, people.
• What are the issues that thou have trouble walking through with others? Why do you think that is, and why does this issue stand out beyond others for you?
• Why do some people fight so hard to keep laws, ideas and principles (regardless of them being religious, social, biblical, etc) elevated in value about the very humans they pertain to?
• What do we learn from Jesus' lifestyle based on the accusations made against him in texts such as Luke 7:33-34?

Discuss

• In your estimate, which takes more maturity and spiritual balance: walking with people through anything or being able to stand your ground regardless of the pressures to compromise?
• In the message, Jonathan gave some points for really employing Me Too in your relationships. Discuss them and find way they apply to people that take no effort, people who you dread, and what it means for someone to....Me Too you.

1. Listen
2. Make it safe
3. Look for common ground

Leader note: You may find that the group is inspired by this idea and has already found ways to make it part of their overall attitude. You may find though, that many of them...or even just one that's vocally skeptical...have specific categories that they put people in, and some of those categories are not Me Too categories. They distance themselves form certain people, citing hurtfulness or a lost cause scenario. As leaders, we must do the work of shepherds and help people understand that Me Too ISN'T a law. Laws kill the spirit of all of this. Me Too is a gift that is given with no expectation of return, but obviously doesn't allow toxic people to live unconfronted by the toxicity of their decisions. If Me Too becomes a law, then it becomes something to do irrespective of the persons involved. It becomes one more way to divide.

As people share the reasons that Me Too is unrealistic (you'll hear the word "boundaries" at least once during this series!...Mis or over-used, It's our favorite loophole for getting out of the difficulties of loving people who aren't capable or willing to love us back!) be sure and draw them back into the necessity of trusting Christ and his resurrecting power to do what we cannot on our own.

DECALOGUE X

How much of how we "live" is rooted in dissatisfaction with our current situation?

How much of the machine of society runs on the gears of getting more, getting new, keeping up and acquiring what others have?

That's the thing; no one would read those two rhetorical questions and feel like they were just invited into some deep insight. We all already know it. And yet, something in us continues to operate as though we'd never come across the idea before.

As you discuss the 10th command, take some time as a group leader seeing how your group will go beyond discussing what it already knows, and into finding ways to actually live differently. Remember, this is about ceasing to be slaves. But slaves aren't free because they know about freedom. They're free because they walk out of the world that enslaved them.

Take some steps out of enslavement this week.

Thaw

• What was the must have toy/shoe/garment/etc of your childhood? Did you ever get it? Did a friend get it first? Do you remember what your friend/sibling having it first did to you? Explain.
• What is it that keeps us behaving lime children where our wants for other people's stuff is concerned?

Leader note: if someone says "continuing to not have", in response to the last question, ask them if people who have things ate less greedy. The answer might help people understand that poverty has nothing to do with greed.

• What most stuck with you from Sunday morning?
• As you listened to the message, did you think about someone in your life, or about yourself more? Why do you think that is?

Read

• Ex 20:17
• Thoughts?
• These are some primitive categories. Tease them out a bit to modernize them for our context?
• Why do you think this command is the last?
• Why do you think it was meaningful enough to make a top ten list for former slaves?

Read

• Luke 12:15
• Thoughts?
• Jesus literally says here, "be seeing, and protect yourself from all forms of greed..."
• What does seeing have to do with anything?
• What is the difference between "seeing" and simply "don't do ______ behavior?"
• What does it mean to be on guard, or to protect or even to watch?
• Why is Jesus painting a picture of looking over your heart like a shepherd over sheep, or a guard over a city?

Read

• Proverbs 4:23
• Do you see a connection to what Jesus is saying in Luke 12? How do the heart being guarded and greed fit together?

Read

• James 4:1
• Thoughts?
• Where does this begin? Why is it significant to know it doesn't start without outward behaviors?

Leader note: it may be worth pointing out that everything begins in the heart. Lust starts there. Murder starts there. Greed and entitlement start there. Once again proving Jesus isn't concerned with behavior management like so much religion is, he starts with where this really begins...the heart!

Read

• James 4:2
• Thoughts?

Discuss

• Tensions, fights, anxieties, dissatisfactions, worries. Describe what wanting something that someone else has done to you or to a relationship. You may take a moment to think about it. It may be someone's property, their appearance, their success, their family, their relationships, their personality, their disposition, their luck....whatever it is, ,explain what these things may have done inside you.
• Additionally, you may not have any issues of greed, coveting or dissatisfaction within you. Share with the group how you got to that point.

Leader note: if someone does venture out to share how they feel free from greed or coveting, pay attention to whether it stems from them coming from money, or coming from peace. Others who are jealous for more "stuff" in their life believe that if they just had more they would be happy. So if the person sharing mentions financial ease, others may pounce and say "see, if I had that wealth background that they had, I'd be fine". As difficult as it is to understand, the wealth or lack of it isn't the issue. The issue is what we are taught to believe about stuff and having it. We already know that the poor are some of the most content people there are, while millionaires are often on record as miserable. We have to do the difficult work of disbelieving that our peace lies in the possession of things (Luke 12:15!!!).

Read

• With the understanding that Paul writes this from a prison cell, and that the Philippian church had scraped together what they could to make sure he had food and water while imprisoned, read Philippians 4:4-13.

Leader note: depending on where you think you can take it, make special note of verse 12. What is this mystical, secret wisdom that Paul learned that centered him, regardless of external circumstances? What experiences are necessary to teach such a deep, mysterious wisdom? Who do we know that seems to know this secret of contentment? How does this pertain to the tenth command and the a slave having his freedom?

Apply

• How does this group go from agreeing about this mentally to living differently?
• How do we train our hearts, convincingly entitled as they can be, to disbelieve our freedom, life and happiness are dependent on having or gaining what others have?
• How does the tension some in the group carry right now begin to wane as they begin "seeing" and "keeping watch"?
• What's one step toward living at peace with what we already have, while celebrating others' fortune and helping with others' misfortune, that we can take?

DECALOGUE IX

Don't bear false witness.

Don't lie.

Don't say things that aren't true.

Don't create a reality that isn't real.

It's all variations on the same theme: What God has put together, let no one fabricate.

As a group, start with the literal meaning in the post-Egyptian justice context Israel found itself in. If you make false accusations, you perpetuate evil. But, as the discuss continues, find ways that outside a courtroom we may still all be bearing, nurturing and propagating false claims about others, bad or good.

Thaw

• What happens inside you emotionally as October arrives? Why do you think that is?
• What most stuck with your from Sunday morning?
• When in your life were you misunderstood or lied about? What were the ramifications of that?
• When is a time you lied or perpetuated a lie about another? What happened because of that?

Read

• Exodus 1:6-14
• Thoughts?

Leader note: It may be helpful to go back to Genesis, last few chapters, and recap how Joseph and the blessing he was positioned Israel to be in great comfort in Egypt initially. They were blessed with land and resources and health. It's not until the "new king" (thought by many to be Ramses II) comes and, through assumptions, false accusations and tyranny, turns it all on Israel's head, or more poignantly, their back.

• The word "know" in hebrew isn't just vague awareness like one "knows" where an address is. This kind of knowing is about intimate interaction and consideration for the other. Based on this, describe how this turn of events went down.
• 
  
• Have you ever noticed how an new employee, student, in-law, neighbor, politician is sized up quickly? Why do people seek to make a determination on others so fast?

Leader note: There are many reasons, but see if the group can come to some agreement about how we like to make up our minds quickly for our own sense of relational safety. When you "know" what someone is, then you can determine how to interact, what they may want from you, where knowing them will get you in life, and how much energy they will take from you. The faster this happens, the faster the sense of security you have. This, obviously, means we settle for all kinds of assumptions and wrong ideas just so we don't go too long with no idea who we're dealing with.

Read

• Exodus 20:16
• Thoughts?
• What does this mean in its most basic sense?
• What happens if we change the word "bear" to "harbor"?
• How about if we change it to "nurture" or "reinforce" or "uncritically examine"?
• What do false ideas do to a person and the society they live in?
• What does this law say about the power of our ability to shape realities, even if they are false?

Discuss

• What if something isn't false? What are the terms for sharing something about someone that you know to be true, firsthand?
• Determine, briefly, as a group, when it's ok and even necessary to share information about another, when that person is not present?

Read

• Proverbs 26:22

Leader note: The Message translation reads this way: "Listening to gossip is like eating cheap candy; do you want junk like that in your belly?"

• What do we learn from this proverb about the impulse, however real and important it feels in the moment, to speak about other people (regardless if the information we are hear or sharing is true or false)?

• Should these words only apply to negative rumors and accusations, or does it also apply to positive things as well?

Leader note: Difficult and potentially alienating as it is, even resisting the urge to gush on people who aren't around trains the mind not to reference those not in attendance, as well as helps ensure that a temple;ate of the person is created and so increases that persons ability to let down others. Tricky, but worth considering. Bear in mind that false witness doesn't mean negative. It simply means untrue. We can build people up or shape other's impressions to the extent that even positive words can do harm.

Apply

• Jonathan referred to pushing the refresh button on everyone you know? How does this apply to people in your life and how you have historically dealt with the?
• What are the implications for realizing that we long to be judged by our intentions and yet quickly judges others by their actions, appearances and words (for years, in some cases)?
• What are the risks associated with disbelieving what you hold in your mind toward those that you know and have carried assumptions and thoughts towards that are unfavorable?
• What are the risks associated with disbelieving what you hold in your mind toward those that you DO NOT KNOW and have carried assumptions and thoughts towards that are unfavorable (celebrities, people groups, politicians, etc..)?
• How can this group be helpful as you enter a season of disbelieving your own thoughts toward others, reassessing what and who others are without the commentary our society has programmed into us, and generally being gracious enough to always assume the 9th commandment is always being broken?

DECALOGUE VIII

This commandment is easy to dismiss if you dont go out at night as a burlger.
But with some reflection, it becomes evident that stealing from people is an attitude that generates behaviors like being a burglar. As always, the Law is Spiritual as Paul stated.

Spend some time as a group finding ways that, despite the lack of larceny, theft has been accepted as a way of life.

Thaw

• What insights would you say you have gleaned from this series over all?
• What are some ways that you understand God, the Bile or your own day-to-life differently?
• What from our time just this Sunday most stuck with you?
• Have you ever had anything stolen? Do tell? Have you ever stolen anything? Tell that too.

Leader note: without making someone sorry they shared something as vulnerable as a time they stole, watch for justifications being added to the story. See if reasons are given in hindsight that have to do with financial need, anger at someone for having, the thrill of excitement, etc. If you decide to bring up the justification given, or asking to clarify if you are hearing a justification, remind the group that theft is always justified in the eyes of the thief. That will help set the stage for the kind of stealing you'll be dealing with later that has less to do with physical stuff.

• What about the vagueness of "You shall not steal" speaks to you?

Leader note: it doesn't list the kinds of things you are ot to steal, nor from whom is stealing prohibited. It leaves it open to EVERYTHING.

Read

• Luke 19:1-9
• Luke 20:21-25
• Thoughts?

Leader note: Notice that Zacchaeus, whose job it was to collect the collected taxes from lower level tax collectors who collected from Roman citizens to an extraordinarily excessive degree, is reversing the direction of possessions. Jesus didn't have to order it.
But in the following chapter, Jesus says (among other things in this highly charged sentence!) that taxes should be paid. Both the tax collectors and the taxed lived in a deep tension of protecting themselves from being taken from, while trying to also fully "get". Both had their justifications and other saw the other not as humans but as receptacles of their possessions. Discuss as a group the work that Jesus is doing in these polarities, what this says to us, while leaving current politics out of the discussion.

Read

• Galatians 5:13-17
• Thoughts?
• What are ways that we can "consume" each other?
• How does this create a break in peace between people or groups?
• How do people who aren't led by the spirit love one another if they are always protecting themselves from one another?

Leader note: the last question isn't designed to become an us versus them. It's instead supposed to illuminate, for faithful people, that the spirit is always trying to teach us to exodus from slavery. Remember, Galatians is to christians. It's for us to do work on us, not talk about "them".

Read

• Eph 4:28
• How is this passage helpful in understanding how Christ wants to retrain the parasitic "flesh" to love?

Leader note: help the group see that the 8th command is a prohibition, but the Spirit of God doesn't just want the rule remaining unbroken.the rule was for us. So, there's a "cease from stealing" and then in place of the stopped behavior, a "love with those hands instead". All the ways that we take from people are ways that we could, instead, find ways to be more loving.


Read

• Matthew 20:28
• John 10:10
• Thoughts?
• How does God as "giver" differ from your view of God growing up?
• What if God doesn't make life comfortable; does this mean he is a taker? Explain.
• What if God doesn't give to "me" what he gives to "you, or does so in different amounts, does this mean he is a taker? Explain.

Discuss

• What does this have to say about treating people with patience? How about gossip? Giving the benefit of the doubt? Second chances?

Leader note: these are a few ways that, instead of taking from someone's life, reputation, etc...we are generous with them. When we are not patient, for example, we take the time from someone that they need because we have chosen to out our timeline up as of higher value than there's. It's a me-centric way of being a taker, rather than a loving giver. Gossip takes away dignity and respect in service to a story I want to tell for personal gain. That, and many other examples, are the work of an internal parasite. No tangibles are taken, but a theft occurs nonetheless.

• There are obvious implications for this commandment and what it means to be a thief.
• Are there any members of this group that feel they may need to admit that they take things, physically or online, or otherwise?

• How does the eighth command apply to the products we buy, the kind of deals we take or the companies we do business with?

• What is God speaking to you about what it means to be less of a taker and how can this group help you step into that?

DECALOGUE VI

You shall not kill.

You shall neither have the heart of a killer.

Use this group time to reflect on not only 9/11 from a strictly American perspective, but as representative for all humanity. What are we learning, as a generation, beyond how to have more power/security etc. to better avenge ourselves?

The cycles of attacks, counter attacks, preemptive attacks, revenge and all out war are obviously systemic, but are birthed in the individual. This is where we focus on ourselves, within our own groups, rather than idly chatting and trying to fix the world without dealing with our own.

Use the texts below to discuss God's kingdom and the way of Jesus where anger and murder (literally and as Jesus positions it in the heart before a corpse is produced!) are concerned. If the conversation slides into politics or is divisive, you will know that it has no longer become a Kingdom of God discussion, but one rooted in the kingdom of men.

"Everything you can do with anger you can do better without it."

-Dallas Willard

Keys Texts for Discussion

Matt. 5:21 “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’

Matt. 5:22 But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment.

Matt. 5:38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Eye for eye, and tooth for tooth.’

Matt. 5:39 But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.

Rom. 12:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.

Rom. 12:18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Rom. 12:19 Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.

Rom. 12:20 On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Rom. 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Eph. 4:26 “In your anger do not sin”

Eph. 4:31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.

Eph. 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Eccl. 7:9 Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.

DECALOGUE V

PAINFUL TRUTH ALERT:

A great and accurate metric for one's real spirituality isn't measured by the things we typically call spiritual, but by how one's heart is toward their mommy and daddy. Understand all this, and the growth we try and experience by focusing outside of ourselves and our immediates will finally be ours.

This should be a fun discussion.

Thaw

• What's something you are planning to do next summer if you are able to?
• How did this summer's experience lend to this idea formed?

• What themes or overarching statements are you gathering from the commandments thus far?
• How does your familiarity with the decalogue shape this?
• What has most stuck with you from Sunday morning?

Read

• Exodus 20:12
• Ephesians 6:2-4

• What immediate pictures, feelings and thoughts come to you when you hear this? Where does that come from?
• What are the implications of this command being the only prescription, while the others are prohibitive?
• How is this command enhanced by considering it's directed at the children of those who would worship a golden calf while this very law was being given?

Read

• Have someone read the Colossians 3:1-21, from the Message Translation, aloud for the whole group. Choose someone that can read slowly, with inflection, and see what stands out in Paul's words about what it means to be the people of Christ.

So if you're serious about living this new resurrection life with Christ, act like it. Pursue the things over which Christ presides. Don't shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of you. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ—that's where the action is. See things from his perspective.

Your old life is dead. Your new life, which is your real life—even though invisible to spectators—is with Christ in God. He is your life. When Christ (your real life, remember) shows up again on this earth, you'll show up, too—the real you, the glorious you. Meanwhile, be content with obscurity, like Christ.

And that means killing off everything connected with that way of death: sexual promiscuity, impurity, lust, doing whatever you feel like whenever you feel like it, and grabbing whatever attracts your fancy. That's a life shaped by things and feelings instead of by God....

Don't lie to one another. You're done with that old life. It's like a filthy set of ill-fitting clothes you've stripped off and put in the fire. Now you're dressed in a new wardrobe. Every item of your new way of life is custom-made by the Creator, with his label on it. All the old fashions are now obsolete. Words like Jewish and non-Jewish, religious and irreligious, insider and outsider, uncivilized and uncouth, slave and free, mean nothing. From now on everyone is defined by Christ, everyone is included in Christ.

So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It's your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it.

Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness. Let the Word of Christ—the Message—have the run of the house. Give it plenty of room in your lives. Instruct and direct one another using good common sense. And sing, sing your hearts out to God! Let every detail in your lives—words, actions, whatever—be done in the name of the Master, Jesus, thanking God the Father every step of the way.

Wives, understand and support your husbands by submitting to them in ways that honor the Master.

Husbands, go all out in love for your wives. Don't take advantage of them.

Children, do what your parents tell you. This delights the Master no end.

Parents, don't come down too hard on your children or you'll crush their spirits.

• As Paul makes his way through these ideas, to the family, what thoughts come to mind?
• What words or sentences stood out the most?
• How does learning to honor parents, regardless of their earning it or their reciprocating it affect other relationships through life?

Apply

• What has your heart gotten used to telling you that your parents owe you?
• What would have to happen for your relationship with your father and/or mother to be what you think it out to be, ideally?
• How do words like forgiveness, trust, demands, bitterness, maturity, and hope say to your situation?
• How can these people, in this group, help you take one step past the mere concepts and make the healthy reality of the 5th command begin to take shape?

Additional Texts for Meditation

• Romans 5:6-8
• Matthew 7:12
• 1 John 4:13-21

DECALOGUE IV

Discuss as a group how to put better rhythm in life. Allow those who have good rhythm to share how they got there and how they handle it mentally.

Discuss the reality that sabbath says your work is done even if it isn't.

Discuss how the Spirit of sabbath is trying to get the slaves out of us.

Discuss how an inability to turn off, rhythmically, is a form of dying.

Key texts for discussion:

Deut 4

Deut 5

Exodus 31

Mark 2

Mark 3

Colossians 2:16

Based on the content of the teaching/message:

What were the key points for you?

What was the "one thing" you took away?

What surprised you?

What bothered you? Why?

Have you ever heard or come across a similar teaching or idea? Have you ever been taught something that was contradictory?

What is/was already part of your thinking on this subject?

What did you learn that was new to you?

*About God?

*About yourself?

*About others?

What changes of thought are necessary in light of what you learned?

What changes of action are needed?

How would life be different if you/we applied this teaching fully?

What are the hindrances, and what do we do about those?

What role can this group play to help you take steps this week and beyond?

DECALOGUE III

Though not a justification, often times racism in a person stems from a negative encounter with a particular member of a so-called race early in life. Sometimes people don't go to the doctor because of a horror story they heard at an impressionable age. And some kids won't eat any vegetables because of a vague memory of the texture of pureed carrots being force fed to them in a high chair.

One bad experience can unfairly, but powerfully, cast a shadow on a whole category.

And sometimes that experience is a person of faith, and the category is God.

Use this discussion to both wipe away the human fingerprints from God's love, and to help snap into realignment those of us that have gotten used to speaking comfortably and simplistically for God about the difficulties of real life.

Thaw

• Football season: "Hurray", "Boo" or "What's football?" Explain.
• What has been on your mind in the last week, and why do you think it has been in your thoughts?

• What has stuck with you from Sunday morning?
• Considering the message was simultaneously for followers of Jesus, people who want to follow but keep their distance in many ways, and non-followers, what is your specific position on the point of the message?
• Who did you think of during the message, and why do you think that is?

Read

• Micah 6:1-8
• Thoughts?

Leader note: The prophet Micah is largely constructed like court proceedings. Israel has a complaint, and so does YHWH. At this point in chapter 6, God is asking "how have I burdened you?". The implication is that his people are claiming they have a burden, and they may be telling the truth. It just wasn't given to them from God. God reminds them that he is the one that "un-burdened" them from slavery. (Jesus makes a similar point when he tells his followers about is yoke and burden being easy and light in that it all boils down to putting others first Matthew 11:30). A list of supposed wants and needs for a religion-protecting God follows in Micah: what does the Lord require of a person....gallons of this? tons of that? your children? various of your interests that make God out to be the taker, and not the giver? In verse 8, Micah is credited by the Talmud as actually summarizing the whole of Torah; be just, be loving, be humble in your ongoing journey with God.

Gently help people resist the urge to say "this applied to the Jews, but it's not enough because Jesus and becoming a Christian hasn't shown up yet". Jesus' message was identical, and in his Spirit this Micah 6:8 life is the life we live. Make sure people don't think God gave inaccurate information about what he wanted to Micah!

• What does doing justice, loving kindness and walking humbly with God mean?
• What do you feel like is missing from this list based on what you have come to believe about what God wants?

Read

• Exodus 20:8
• Literally: "You will not carry the name of YHWH God emptily, for YHWH clears not the name of him who carries the name emptily."
• Thoughts?
• Why is it important to not use God's name, title, etc as a common expression, profanity or in ways outside of actually referencing him?

Leader note: It might be helpful to help the group understand the Jewish principle of "gezeirah". This is essentially a "fence" put around the heart of the command or issue at stake. A gezeirah protects the person from being able to eventually commit the greater offense. Like a parent who makes a rule that the kids can't play in the front yard, only the back. This seemingly strict, even odd rule may not make sense to the kids. But, the parent knows they live on a dangerously busy street. "Don't play in the front" is a protective gezeirah for the real matter- don't play in the street on penalty of death or severe injury. This idea is common in Torah, and is best understood as parental for a nation of former slaves (and us today, whose hearts still believe they are slaves) that needed strictness to "keep them out of the street". In light of this, understanding the traditional dimension of taking the very literal name of God seriously, undoubtedly connects in our minds and behaviors to continuing to revere God and his interests, rather than making them common or dismissed by way of familiarity.

• If this command is so that people far from him, or even people not in leadership positions, would remain clear about the difference between God's heart and human religion, what does this tell you about the power of the lives and behaviors of religious people?

Discuss

• What is something you feel you're supposed to believe about God, but have trouble with?

Leader note: Don't attempt to handle metaphysical, origin-of-everything kinds of questions in one LifeGroup. Let the weight of the question be realized if they ask, make sure responses are humble, and try and keep the discussion on the kinds of lives we're to live with or without all our scientific questions answered. Additionally, and perhaps more importantly, remember that Jesus is our measuring stick for what we believe God is like (John 14:8-10). So, in trying to discern what God is like, what we're called to, and how we can know anything about the Divine, it's always safest and most accurate to reference Jesus.

• What is something you have said to others in a moment of attempting to be helpful, but realized you don't even believe for yourself?
• Where do we get the impulse to have answers and speak for God?
• Why do we often condemn the actions of others, referencing God's holiness, and yet think of ourselves in terms of our intentions, referencing God's grace?
• What does Micah 6:8 say to this?
• What does Galatians 5:21-22 say to this?

Leader note: Reminder, "fruit" means "evidence". Note the kinds of words not in this list by Paul in determining if God's Spirit is in play. Condemnation, hypocrisy, stubborn stances, excommunications, trite explanations for serious matters...none of these are evidence that God's Spirit is at work.

Apply

• How does this group apply all this?
• How will this group know it has successfully applied all this?
• What step are you taking now?