Mistakes Part II

2. Carrying too much

The greatest preventable mistake made by small-group leaders comes when they try to carry too much—the "I'll just do it myself" syndrome. Though this is often faster, cleaner and takes less thought and planning- long term, it creates and recreates the kinds of environments that put stress on leaders and don't lead to growth for anyone. 

There are two main ways this happens:

• Not sharing leadership. There are many times in the life-cycle of a group where members can and should lead discussions, plan and organize serving, plan social get-togethers, etc... Group leaders can save a lot of time and mental energy just by finding an administratively-gifted member to take care of follow-up phone calls, contact information, and tracking birthdays and anniversaries. Let each member take responsibility, so at the end of the life-cycle you have capable leaders, not incapable observers. 

• Not facilitating discussions. Group leaders can fall into a trap when they define themselves as teachers—as someone charged to become an expert on a subject and then create an interesting and educational "lesson" for each group meeting. Instead, group leaders should view themselves as facilitators. They need to be prepared, yes, but the entire burden for working through a curriculum should never rest on one set of shoulders. Lead to learn as a group, using tools for study and discovery together, rather than take on the enormous (and generally impossible) task of a Life Group Jeeves.

Mistakes

I'm indebted to Ried Smith for inspiring some good thinking in me about Life Group leadership. Over the next few days, I'll share about the common mistakes and pitfalls group leaders make and fall into. Let's reflect on each of them as we continue to ask God to help us create the best Life Group environments we can.

1. Not being yourself

Authenticity is the key to success as a small-group leader. In general, people won't put up for long with a small group where members aren't genuine with each other—we all have better ways to spend our time each week. And the greatest influence on the authenticity within a small group is arguably how real the small-group leader behaves within the group. Does he confess sins and admit faults, or does he try to project an image of perfection? Does she ask for help when times are tough, or does she try to soldier on?

The health of a small group is directly linked to the degree of freedom that members have to be themselves, and that starts with the leader. Does he confess sins and admit faults, or does he try to project an image of perfection? Does she ask for help when times are tough, or does she try to soldier on?

John Ortberg states it well: "You cannot be fully loved if you are not fully known. You can only be completely loved if you are completely known." People want to go someplace where they are loved for who they are rather than who they feel they have to be. Group participants follow the lead of the small-group leader in this way more than they realize, so demonstrated vulnerability from leadership has tremendous "imprinting power" that can ensure the health of the group for the life of the group.

Pop quiz, hot shot...

It's one thing to take this quiz. It's quite another to share your score with us.

http://www.gotoquiz.com/ultimate_bible_quiz

Paul said in 1 Corinthians 8 that Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. So, if you get a low score- no worries...we will love you more. (But, if you score higher, we'll call you egotistical or an obvious cheat.)

Enjoy!

Steve

"Unpacking"... Studying the study of scripture

Studying the scriptures is very near the center of what it means to pursue God. But ask 5 people about the Bible, and you’ll find 4 of them don’t read it as much as they would like, and 8 opinions about what it is.

The message Sunday is designed to be helpful for anybody, at any stage of their journey of faith, in understanding the Scriptures.

The following study is meant to take the members of your group forward just one step. As a result, if you have experience in studying the Bible, you'll note that there is much more to say and explore in this area. Be content, for your group as a whole, to take one step in their confidence in the Bible having meaning in their lives. For some people, that step will be reading the Bible for the first time. For others, it will be shedding the guilt that comes from not liking to open it very often due to lack of comprehension. Make it your goal, as the group leader, to create an environment that opens itself from this point forward as a place where people can ask better questions, enjoy the mystery, and begin to find the Bible as a major tool in How God invites us into a very ancient, real and wonderful story.

________________________________________

Discussion 

Thaw

• What’s the last book you read?
  
• Which one of the following quotes is not in the Bible?

1. “The Lord never gives a man more than he can himself handle”

2. “God helps those who help themselves”

3. “This too, shall pass”

4. “Money is the root of all evil”

The answer is none. 1. Is a saying that’s actually harmful, because it teaches that God designs life to be well managed alone- without Him or others- which is contrary to our faith. 2. Is Ben Franklin in Poor Richard's Almanac, 1757. (Psalm 25:4 actually teaches the opposite!) 3.Seems to go all the way back to a parable of Solomon, not in the Bible, as well as some more recent use in poetry and speeches by by many, including Abraham Lincoln. 4. This is almost in the Bible- 1 Timothy 6:10 states “The LOVE of money is the root of all kinds of evil…”. You can see that that’s a different statement altogether!

Discuss

• What from the message Sunday was most helpful?
  
• What was most surprising or challenging?
  
• Was there anything you disagreed with? What and why?
  
• Jonathan states that the context in which the scripture is written is everything. Cultural, literary, theological, geographic contexts shape meaning. Respond to this as a group and what it means as we read the Bible today.
  

 

Leader note: The following is excerpted from Martin Luther King’s famous "I have a dream" speech from the Lincoln Memorial in 1963. Read it aloud and then answer the questions that follow:

"...In a sense we have come to our nation’s capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men would be guaranteed the inalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned...."

• Does anyone in the group not know what Dr. King is referring to?
  
• Dr. King is using metaphor to make a larger point. In 3000 years, which parts do you think would be difficult to understand? Would any parts seem meaningless?
  

Leader note: You may want to read through it again and let them hear how much of this rests on the audience’s understanding of the words, images and events surrounding the speech in 1963. In 3000 years, what if there is no cash, checks, promissory notes and therefore no concept of how these systems worked, let alone how they would be helpful in illustrating whatever point this ancient Doctor King is trying to make to whomever is apparently listening. And what is the "Constitution"? "The Declaration of Independence"? Why did the "note" only promise “men”? Would they be shocked to find that inalienable rights was a term not original with King, and was found within the other documents the people of 3000 years ago were generally aware? If he was a "King", why didn't he just make things happen, rather that speak about it not happening? What are "citizens of color"? Were there citizens who lacked color? Which colors were they? Was it a perhaps an issue of status to wear certain colors? Why were these people so caught up in different colors, and why is this King wasting time talking about it? Were people with color not given life or happiness, but people without it were given life and happiness? Did the colors come with the "promissory note"? What was going on that made this irrelevant-sounding speech and strange word-pictures important?

We take for granted that we currently understand all the aspects of the language, times, political issues, humor, etc…This certainly means that we hear Dr. King differently than he would be heard, with out contextual study, in a different time, place, language and culture.

Read

Leader’s note: The following is an example of how it is important to slow down on a Biblical text, consider the assumptions you may bring to the text, as well as consider the cultural, geographic and social background onto which words are written and spoken.

• Luke 9:57-58
  
• What's the meaning of this text as you understand it?
  
• Now read  Matthew 8:19-20
  
• What differences do you note, and how does this deepen or shift your thinking of Jesus’ response?
  

Leader note: you may point out that a teacher of the Law is a highly respected religious leader with much to lose. This has different significance than a man on the road. Matthew is more in sync with the Hebrew culture, and may have been more impressed with the man being a Jewish teacher of Jewish Law- therefore having a teacher call Jesus a teacher. Luke, the Greek speaking doctor, may have been less tuned into this Jewish nuance and more impressed with and focused on Jesus’ response.

• Now take into consideration that eagles, birds of the air, are the chief symbol of Roman power at this time, and foxes are one of the symbols for Herod and the “almost Jews” that colluded with Rome to make the rich richer and to neglect God’s way of peace and equity.
• With this contextual picture of lofty, powerful birds in comfy nests, and foxes burrowed into holy ground- now how do you hear Jesus speaking to the eager follower, in his setting?
• Why doesn’t the text record the response of the teacher that said he’d follow Jesus wherever?
• What are the real-life (versus merely religious, disconnected, hyper-spiritual) implications of Jesus’ response, in its context, for those of us today that seek Christ in our context?
• How has this example study the scriptures based on the who, what, where and why been helpful?

Apply

 Leader note: Discuss the following and allow for discussion on each one. This is simply a tool to help understand the broadest themes that connect the Bible (or Biblical narrative) from Genesis to Revelation. Further study reveals that within each “act”, there are views, language, cultural and social norms, politics, jokes, puns, literary styles that must be also understood, or at least acknowledged to exist, to get the full sense of how that particular “act” is addressing the character of God, His plans, and our response.

A good way to think of the overarching narrative of the scriptures is

• Act 1- Creation. The Bible paints a picture, rich with metaphor, poetry and rhythm to present to us an intended creation.
•  Act 2- The Fall. What God intended is now marred by the rebellion of God’s favorite creatures- us! And that sin and rebellion against His Kingship has everything broken.
• Act 3- Israel. God selects from among all people a chosen nation to be the light of the world. These would be the people that would show off who God is, and show people how to live in His ways. The Bible tells their story, as well as all the recurring ways that they became and remained part of the problem.
• Act 4- Jesus. Jesus is the culmination of God’s redemptive plan to steer all of the world back to what He had intended in Act 1. Jesus isn’t starting something brand new as much as He is providing the passage from where we are back to what God wants for us.
• Act 5- The church. The church is simply the extension of Jesus’ redeeming mission for all creation. We take His message and His love further, living our lives currently in His Kingdom (under His reign and will), inviting others on the journey- bringing light into the darkness. All this while awaiting a final moment where the affects of Act 2 are finally and completely removed.

Additional passages to consider:

• Hebrews 4:12 
• II Timothy 3:16
• John 20:30-31
• Psalm 119:9-16
• Phil 4:8
• John 6:67-69

Resources for further study.

• The study to the right entitled "Bible Crash Course"
  
• http://www.biblegateway.com/
  
• http://www.blueletterbible.org/
  
• http://www.followtherabbi.com/Brix?pageID=1458
  
• Google!!! (Seriously, it can help you discover all kinds of research on specific Biblical texts and the context in which it was written and read. You will most certainly get some crazy ideas mixed in- so never arrive at a conclusion based on the fruit of one Google search- but use it to get you exploring background and words.
  

If God uses this message and study in your group to build more of an appreciation for the scriptures, or an increased desire for the discipline of Bible-reading in their lives- please share the stories with the rest us!

 

 

 

 

Listening through attending behavior

This is an excerpt from an article written by Pastor Doug Self. What a great reminder for us who lead groups, trying a to create an environment that lends itself to more listening than "teaching" or speaking. Enjoy.

As a pastor, my responsibilities include visiting the members of my flock inside their homes. I have experienced some success in this part of ministry, but I still find myself apprehensive about visiting people.

I can overcome such fear in one of two ways. I can learn to always say the right thing at the right time—but let's face it, that's never going to happen. Or I can realize that it's not saying the right things, but listening in the right way that's crucial to personal visitation.

I'll take the latter, and not because it's easier—actually, good listening can be grueling. But when I focus on listening to another person, it takes the pressure off me. I become less concerned about myself and more concerned about the person I'm listening to. I don't come as an expert ready to spew forth, but as a learner seeking to discover.

Attending Behavior
One of the most important listening skills I have encountered is attending behavior—the nonverbal parts of conversation. This includes eye contact, facial expressions, and body posture.

Attending behavior, for all its seeming passivity, is a powerful skill. In one experiment, six college students were trained in attending behavior. Then a visiting lecturer, not known for his dynamic lecturing, was invited to class. The lecturer was tied to his notes and used no gestures, and his voice droned on in a monotone.

At a prearranged signal, the students began to evidence attending behavior: they riveted their eyes on the lecturer, leaned forward in their chairs, and took on intent expressions. Within 30 seconds the lecturer gestured for the first time, his voice inflection became more dynamic, and his presentation more lively (from Robert Bolton, People Skills, Prentice-Hall, 1979).

Subtle Communication
Attending behavior is a powerful motivational tool. It draws people out. It lets them know they are being taken seriously. But attending behavior is subtle, so it's something I have to pay attention to, lest I communicate the wrong thing.

Some time ago, I was eating breakfast at a local restaurant with a friend. A man walked to our table and asked, "Are you Doug Self, the pastor?" When I said I was, he sat down and began telling us about his Christian commitment and plans to move to our area.

After a few minutes the man left, and my friend asked, "Why were you so aloof, so hostile to a new person in the community?"

"Aloof and hostile?" I asked, "What do you mean? I visited with him. I talked with him."

Then my friend pointed out that I had taken a body position that faced 90 degrees away from him, folded my arms, and looked out the window during parts of the conversation. I was surprised. I knew I was vaguely uncomfortable with the man, but I thought I had been gracious to him.

As I thought about it afterward, I realized what had happened. I have been burned by many people who come into our community, talk a good religious line, but end up causing problems in the church and community. Although I thought I was communicating acceptance to the man, my body was signaling what I felt inside: that I pegged him as potential trouble and hoped he would stay away.

Over the years, I have worked on my inherent prejudice against such people. And when I am aware that distrust is stirring within me, I deliberately monitor my body language. Sometimes such people have ulterior motives, but first I want to give them the benefit of the doubt, with my words and my body posture.

Life Groups changing life...

I talked to Gene Erickson about the Life Group they lead on Thursday evenings, and something God has been doing through their groups efforts in recent months. Please read and enjoy the following example, shared by Gene, of what happens when we lead our groups to overlap other's lives and give Christ space to love and heal. Thanks Erickson group!

Sandra contacted the Resources for Seniors department of Wake County in mid November 2007, as part of our Life Group service to the community.  The group wanted to reach out to a person in need in our area. 

The Resources department, in turn, identified a senior citizen needing a friend, someone who might consider her needs and help her in her time of need.  The reality is that she did not know she was in need.  Linda is a feisty 80 year-old amputee, who lost a leg due to poor circulation some 9 years ago.  She was born in Southport, NC to a farming family and was one of 2 daughters.  The family needed farm help, and it turned out someone to do the housework.  Linda chose to work on the farm.  She spent many a day behind a mule, plowing the sandy loam of the North Carolina coast, raising tobacco, or ’baccer as it is known here, as the main family cash crop, which has been so common in the history of the state.  Eventually, she married and started a family, moving from Southport to as far as Indiana, before returning to her home state.  Prior to losing her leg, she worked many years in the textile mills around what is now known as Fuquay-Varina.  One of her daughters lived with her in a double-wide home in Lillington.  They paid off the land and the trailer some time before she lost her leg.  She lost her last of 4 husbands many years ago, and now resides in a Wake County subsidized 2 bedroom unit of the Fuquay Homes for the Elderly. 

When she was referred to Sandra as an elderly citizen in need, little did we realize her many needs.  Our first visit to her home was 3 weeks before Christmas, and to our surprise a brusque next door neighbor, Kress, appeared while we were talking with her and trying to learn a bit more about her.  Kress was intimidating, and wanted to know why we were there.  In the series of several more visits, we learned that Kress is the ROCK, her neighbor of the same age, but with a very different family status.  Kress has 2 daughters and a retired son, who really care about their mother, and visit regularly.

In contrast, when we met Linda, we eventually learned that she was a text book case of elderly citizen abuse-by her own daughter and grandson(s) who lived in Lillington.  We would not have learned of the following details if it were not for her closest true friend, Kress.  Through Kress we learned that her daughter and 2 grandsons who earlier had lived with Linda as she toiled long hours in the textile factories of Fuquay-Varina for the last 8 years had continued to benefit from Linda’s social security income checks.  That was so shocking and unimaginable to us.  A few years ago her daughter asked her for a loan against her life insurance policy to build a new home on the same land near Linda’s double wide home, which Linda agreed to do.  That was the last time Linda has seen that daughter.  However, her grandsons of that daughter continued to visit Linda occasionally at the Homes for the Elderly.  One was somewhat helpful, doing her laundry periodically.  He even offered to help her pay her bills-the rent, utilities and insurance payments.  However, as Sandra dug a bit deeper we learned that he did not pay the bills.  Her life insurance and rent were back due because he used the money himself.  He recently lost his job at Campbell University.  And he had wrecked his car a bit earlier….  He bought another one, assuming he would have a job to pay for it with a payment of $400 per month.

Guess how he paid for it.  Yes, he got the money from his grandmother, over 40% of her social security check.  This meant, by the time we began to know her, that she did not have money to pay for her medical prescriptions, which are critical to her health.  She has a heart insufficiency problem that requires both anticoagulant therapy and diuretics to help with her poor circulation.  Not having her diuretic was very dramatic for us, when we saw her remaining foot swell painfully and turn a dark red in color.  She has chronic pain in the remaining leg up to her hip joint, and her physician has recommended its removal, which she has refused. 

Upon realizing those details we asked her if she would mind if we took over her finances to assure that she would be able to pay her bills and buy her critically needed medications.  She agreed willingly, and Sandra now coordinates all her bills.  She is now able to pay her medications and we were able to contact 4 insurance companies to reinstate her revoked policies due to non payment.  She was thrilled to get a $40 allowance, and understands there are several bills yet to be paid.  Her creditors have been understanding when the story has been related to them. 

Sadly, if Linda purchased a new item, her grandson and/or daughter would remove it from her unit to put it in the double wide home in Lillington.  That is amazing.  The existing possessions in her unit are dilapidated at best. We have arranged for the locks to be changed, as one of the grandsons has a key.  The grandson that came every month at the date the social security payment arrived to get money for his car payment and more to cover his expenses at the default of his grandmother’s bills, appeared once more the first of January, 2008 to repeat his usual request.  His grandmother told him she did not have any money, not even a checkbook.  He was angry and left, and is unlikely to return.

The Life Group had a Christmas Day social, and Linda was there to join a larger family. The Group took her on a shopping spree at the new Holly Springs super WalMart store.

Linda was taken her to her visit her mentally handicapped daughter in a Lillington rest home.  It was so touching to see the amazement and joy of her daughter, Rosalee, when she saw her mother for a second visit in less than 2 months.  Rosalee is so precious.  She clearly loves her mother so very deeply. 

Many needs, and we continue this journey with Linda.  Her health is poor, and we do not know how much longer she will live.  We hope, by getting her proper medications every day, it will be much longer.  She is such a good person.  She is someone everyone needs to realize is here in our community.   Certainly, she and others do not need that much, just a little bit of help, care and compassion.  That is our mission and outreach to our community at present.  It is a joy and an honor, but it is also a huge learning curve in human love.  Kress is the rock that has cared for Linda, and is Linda’s best friend. 

Every...body Discussion Questions

Hopefully, as this series wraps up, you have gotten a chance to  experience as a group the "every-ness" of God and life in Him. As faith continues to be more about who we are, rather than an idea we express, God continues to have more room to work out His dream for people and to proclaim the good news of His Kingdom. This Sunday, as we wrap up the series, we will spend some time letting God's Spirit do inventory on how we are ensuring that all peoples, from all walks of life and all backgrounds, see His Kingdom in us. Use your group discussion time as a way of discovering any "us and them" mentality that may run contrary to the invitation of Christ for all people to be one.

_______________________________________

Discussion 

Thaw

Share a time when you were picked last (or not at all) as a kid to be on a team, or to go to a party, etc...

Why did this happen?

Was there ever a time that you did the picking? Do you remember your criteria.

In what ways does the playground mentality express itself in grown up world? (work, school, politically, internationally, culturally, economically, ethnically)

Read

Isaiah 25:6-9

What are you surprised by?

What is the veil or covering that's over people?

Leader note: Take some time to point out that "saved" and "salvation" here are about the end of a system of thought that divides people. This may come as a surprise for the narrower view that salvation deals with avoiding hell after death. Also note that the word "stretched" or "covering"  (depending on the translation) in verse 7 is the Hebrew word "nasak", translated literally "woven". Discuss the implications of a "woven" system of thought, or a "woven" social dynamic between people. What are examples of the social weave that need unwoven? What might this have to do with the "death" that God is going to swallow up and the tears that he will wipe away?

Read Luke 14:7-15

What are your first thoughts about Jesus' parable and the response in verse 15?

What must change to be the kind of person who does things for people who cannot repay?

Leader note: make sure to not let people too narrowly define "repayment" in the financial sense alone. Often times, repayment is a stroked ego, a sense of accomplishment or a bolstered sense of identity based on doing "good things". One might even do an opposite harm by focusing in on the lowly as a spiritual  project/obligation. What are the implications for doing things for people who don't thank us, don't make us look good, or are even insulting an unappreciative? Would we do it again? Why or why not? Remember vs. 11 demands humility!

Read vs. 16-24

Thoughts?

What is Jesus teaching about the invitation of the gospel?

How does that differ from what you already thought of the gospel? God?

Leader note: The word "compel" in vs. 23 has been grossly misunderstood by some parts of the church through the centuries. As a result, people have been forced to submit to the crushing power of others who come proclaiming the name of Jesus, but not the will and reputation of Christ. This word, in the Middle Eastern sense, is used to denote not the force of the one inviting, but the humility of the invitee. "I'm lame, crippled, poor- outcast, surely I'm not invited." But this is no regular feast- it's the Isaiah 25 feast of God- all are invited. The compelling here is necessary because they aren't used to being invited to anything, let alone a Master's feast. But the invitation is to be lovingly insisted upon as not too good to be true!

Apply:

Who are the isolated, oppressed and marginalized in our culture?

Are Christians first to burst through those walls and barriers? Should they be?

How does what we do for a living, what we buy, how we vote, what we support worsen the divide? Improve it?

What actions can and should be taken by followers of Jesus today?

What actions can this group take together?

What actions or changes of mind need to be taken by individual members?

Prayer

Spend some time praying for awareness. Who is getting left out? Who is "them"? Who is it that remains at the borders and edges of our life? Who is it that suffers outside the banquet? Who are the people that we have grown used to saying "it's their own fault...if they would just _______"?

Additional texts to consider: Galatians 3:28, Acts 17:26, Ephesians 2:13-18

Every...day Discussion Questions

What are you asking/begging God for that is so huge, so risky, so scary that it honors His power and majesty?

As a group leader, you'll want, as always, to be creating an occasion for life change. Begin your discussion time by breaking the ice, but make sure and spend much time allowing each member to share the faith rattling, daring requests that they will begin putting openly before God and their group. You may want to contact them, at least via email, ahead of time to tell them to begin thinking of just what it is that they will would be willing to share.

 

Thaw

-What's something you bugged your parents for as a kid, that after a long time, you finally got?

-Do you remember something you prayed for as a child?

-What examples of answered prayer have you experienced?

  

Read

Luke 11:1-13

-What's something that you are surprised or stumped by?

-Are there any insights from the message on Sunday that jumped out at you?

-Does verse 10 seem realistic or not? Explain? How might we have misunderstood this promise? How might we have covered or apologized for it?

-Verse 13 assumes we know how to give good gifts to our children? What are examples of bad gifts to kids, and what makes them bad?

_______________________________________________________

Leader’s note: A few things to note here are one, the use of the word "evil". In greek, it is πονηρός 'poneros' and means sickened, blind or in bad condition, in the physical sense as well as in the behavioral. Jesus is contrasting us with The Father, which makes us all look sick! Additionally, this question is meant to get the group realizing that a child getting everything she asks (prays) for would be the mark of a bad parent. That would be very bad for the child. But if we, flawed as we are, know that- how much more does God know how to give us what we really need. You may also try and uncover as a group the fact that what we so desperately want may in fact be bad. Our desperation being responded to by God with a "no" or perceived silence seems so hurtful, but parents know that crying doesn't change what's really necessary. 

_______________________________________________________

-Is it possible that the majority of what we request out of a sense of need is actually bad for us and those we do life with? Is it possible we don't even know what we want, let alone need?

_______________________________________________________

Leaders note: You may share examples as a group of things God seems to be silent on in terms of what's being asked for, and, depending on the trust level you sense exists- share as a group that that request is actually out of selfishness, self-interest, consumption, excess, or ways that isolate and broaden gaps between people. These things are repeatedly spoken against by Jesus. Are there things we pray to God for that aren't "in His name" (or "in accordance with His reputation") that actually go against, in even subtle ways, his desire for the world?

_______________________________________________________

Apply

Take a large sheet of paper and put the names of each group member on it, with the date. Go around the room and allow each member to share something huge that, despite the risk and the inability to make it work on paper- they sense they need to start "banging on the door" about. Finish the evening on this exercise, and communicate to the group that you will be saving the sheet and referring to it from time to time to check in on what God has been doing with these requests, and on the members' diligence in continually "knocking".

 ______________________________________________________

Leader's Note: Don't feel the need to correct some of the strange prayers you will hear. But, if you are gathering by the nature of what people are saying they want to start begging God for, that they are saying something they don't mean, or that they aren't sharing something really from the heart because they don't think God cares about it- you may want to prod a little. Maybe you know Mike loves music and wants to have music as more a part of his life- even as part of what he does for a living. He may not feel like God would care about that. You may say, then- "Mike, what would you think about asking God to create an opportunity for you to create and play music? That sounds like something you'd really like to start pounding His door down for. Once people see that it's safe to really throw the huge stuff out there, they'll follow suit.

You may also find people wanting to ask God for a quality of life make-over. Without condemnation- try and get them to ask God to make them part of other people's lives- part of the gospel initiative of Jesus. Steer them to see that "in Jesus' Name" means something so big and beautiful that Jesus would hang His name on it. Celebrate honesty and vulnerability during this time together, and watch as you have everyone trusting each other and growing in faith in friendship because of this exercise. 

_______________________________________________________

 

Every...time Discussion guide

We are always proclaiming to people what we believe about Jesus and the good news of His Kingdom. Always.

The purpose of Sunday's message entitled Every...time and the group study that comes with it is to help Christians understand that evangelism is more about showing the relational and transformational power of God's Kingdom in our life- not just a slick sales pitch that creates an occasion for choosing sides. One of the goals of your group time is to explore ways in which what's believed has already been communicated, regardless of whether a "spiritual conversation" has taken place or not.

______________________________________________________

Discussion guide

Thaw

Have you ever been treated well by someone who turned out to only want to sell you something?

What kinds of words or phrases come to mind when you hear the words "evangelist", "share the gospel", "evangelical"?

Read

Luke 4:16-19

Does this personal mission statement of Jesus differ with how you would have described His mission? How?

What are some areas of our day to day life that run in opposition to creating good news for the poor, release to the captives, healing, equity, etc?

leader note: If some areas are uncovered, discuss how these affect a follower of Jesus and his/her ability to point to their belief as "good news". If someone is hearing a Christian talk about how Jesus saves the world, but is seeing that the system isn't really changing things in ways that prove any sort of god was at work- would they call it good news? How does intellectualizing (or reducing to a ideological discussion) the gospel both take away from Jesus' mission and people's ability to "observe" that it's of God?

Apply

In Mark 5:1-20, the formerly demon-possessed man is instructed to go and tell people what God has done. That, for Jesus, will be plenty in communicating that God's Kingdom is at hand. 

-Share ways, no matter how big or small that you have seen God change your own life, or the life of someone close to you.

Leader note: if people are having a tough time coming up with anything, you may have to guide them to be aware of God in their midst. Ask them if they have experienced a difficulty in recent months or years, and what they learned from it. Ask them if they have had any "aha!" relational moments. Help them see ways that the appreciate beauty, compassion, generosity, justice- if even in small ways. If you get the sense that the group is at a loss as to what God may be doing and transforming in their own life, you should take some time to discuss what you, as a group of faith journeyers, can do together to allow God more space in 2008 to do what He does. Feel free to finish your time discussing this, as nothing else you discuss will be as valuable as when you decide that you are all in the group to be transformed by God, as well as an instrument of His transformation in others!

Wrap up

How do the following communicate which Kingdom we have given victory to:

Who we associate with.

What percentage of our income we spend on ourselves.

How speak to and about people.

Who we call enemies.

How we see those who have wronged or insulted us.

Where we cheat.

Whether people define us as talkers or listeners.

What makes us worry.

How we see environmental issues.

Clothing.

Our view of sex.

The number of impoverished people we name as friends.

What we eat.

Being in a Life Group.

Spend some quiet time in reflective prayer to give God's Spirit the room to shine some lights on areas that don't communicate His Kingdom well. Areas where we are living the way of a conquered kingdom of death. If the group members are willing, share some of the insights they may glean from this time so that the other members can encourage and ask about it in months to come.

Groups Leaders take 'everything' further!!!

My very good friend just emailed me this (excerpted below). I think he makes a great point, and it does well to challenge us as we reflect on the various ways in which we eliminate that which drowns out the whisper. Part of our job as Life Group Leaders is to help shape into "living" what is only "hearing" when it doesn't move beyond the sermon. The environment you create each week as a group leader may be the baby step someone needs to exchange what they think is a great, but overly idealistic idea, into an actual way of life.

I just listened to the podcast from last Sunday (I was out of town then). I loved it, loved it, loved it!

 

But I was struck with the question: did you convince others of the truth that God is present now in every moment at every place? and that this truth is EVERYTHING? 

 

We are so brainwashed by/in the consumerist world that a message about God's constant presence and the need for our frequent silence just doesn't register. To most, it's just not practical. ....which is funny, since it's all about 'practice,' according to the literature.  

 

We aren't practiced at silence or solitude. We don't even know how to start. Instead, we participate in and contribute to the stream of noise in which we were born. We practice noise all the time. We just don't know how to practice silence/solitude. In our mega-church culture, are we guilty of adding to the noise and shoving the silence into a corner?

 

I loved your message, but I just wonder if it falls on deaf ears and if we have to do more than talk about it.  Are we creating environments where silence is nurtured and flourishes and where noise is shunned?