Mistakes

I'm indebted to Ried Smith for inspiring some good thinking in me about Life Group leadership. Over the next few days, I'll share about the common mistakes and pitfalls group leaders make and fall into. Let's reflect on each of them as we continue to ask God to help us create the best Life Group environments we can.

1. Not being yourself

Authenticity is the key to success as a small-group leader. In general, people won't put up for long with a small group where members aren't genuine with each other—we all have better ways to spend our time each week. And the greatest influence on the authenticity within a small group is arguably how real the small-group leader behaves within the group. Does he confess sins and admit faults, or does he try to project an image of perfection? Does she ask for help when times are tough, or does she try to soldier on?

The health of a small group is directly linked to the degree of freedom that members have to be themselves, and that starts with the leader. Does he confess sins and admit faults, or does he try to project an image of perfection? Does she ask for help when times are tough, or does she try to soldier on?

John Ortberg states it well: "You cannot be fully loved if you are not fully known. You can only be completely loved if you are completely known." People want to go someplace where they are loved for who they are rather than who they feel they have to be. Group participants follow the lead of the small-group leader in this way more than they realize, so demonstrated vulnerability from leadership has tremendous "imprinting power" that can ensure the health of the group for the life of the group.