Life Groups changing life...

I talked to Gene Erickson about the Life Group they lead on Thursday evenings, and something God has been doing through their groups efforts in recent months. Please read and enjoy the following example, shared by Gene, of what happens when we lead our groups to overlap other's lives and give Christ space to love and heal. Thanks Erickson group!

Sandra contacted the Resources for Seniors department of Wake County in mid November 2007, as part of our Life Group service to the community.  The group wanted to reach out to a person in need in our area. 

The Resources department, in turn, identified a senior citizen needing a friend, someone who might consider her needs and help her in her time of need.  The reality is that she did not know she was in need.  Linda is a feisty 80 year-old amputee, who lost a leg due to poor circulation some 9 years ago.  She was born in Southport, NC to a farming family and was one of 2 daughters.  The family needed farm help, and it turned out someone to do the housework.  Linda chose to work on the farm.  She spent many a day behind a mule, plowing the sandy loam of the North Carolina coast, raising tobacco, or ’baccer as it is known here, as the main family cash crop, which has been so common in the history of the state.  Eventually, she married and started a family, moving from Southport to as far as Indiana, before returning to her home state.  Prior to losing her leg, she worked many years in the textile mills around what is now known as Fuquay-Varina.  One of her daughters lived with her in a double-wide home in Lillington.  They paid off the land and the trailer some time before she lost her leg.  She lost her last of 4 husbands many years ago, and now resides in a Wake County subsidized 2 bedroom unit of the Fuquay Homes for the Elderly. 

When she was referred to Sandra as an elderly citizen in need, little did we realize her many needs.  Our first visit to her home was 3 weeks before Christmas, and to our surprise a brusque next door neighbor, Kress, appeared while we were talking with her and trying to learn a bit more about her.  Kress was intimidating, and wanted to know why we were there.  In the series of several more visits, we learned that Kress is the ROCK, her neighbor of the same age, but with a very different family status.  Kress has 2 daughters and a retired son, who really care about their mother, and visit regularly.

In contrast, when we met Linda, we eventually learned that she was a text book case of elderly citizen abuse-by her own daughter and grandson(s) who lived in Lillington.  We would not have learned of the following details if it were not for her closest true friend, Kress.  Through Kress we learned that her daughter and 2 grandsons who earlier had lived with Linda as she toiled long hours in the textile factories of Fuquay-Varina for the last 8 years had continued to benefit from Linda’s social security income checks.  That was so shocking and unimaginable to us.  A few years ago her daughter asked her for a loan against her life insurance policy to build a new home on the same land near Linda’s double wide home, which Linda agreed to do.  That was the last time Linda has seen that daughter.  However, her grandsons of that daughter continued to visit Linda occasionally at the Homes for the Elderly.  One was somewhat helpful, doing her laundry periodically.  He even offered to help her pay her bills-the rent, utilities and insurance payments.  However, as Sandra dug a bit deeper we learned that he did not pay the bills.  Her life insurance and rent were back due because he used the money himself.  He recently lost his job at Campbell University.  And he had wrecked his car a bit earlier….  He bought another one, assuming he would have a job to pay for it with a payment of $400 per month.

Guess how he paid for it.  Yes, he got the money from his grandmother, over 40% of her social security check.  This meant, by the time we began to know her, that she did not have money to pay for her medical prescriptions, which are critical to her health.  She has a heart insufficiency problem that requires both anticoagulant therapy and diuretics to help with her poor circulation.  Not having her diuretic was very dramatic for us, when we saw her remaining foot swell painfully and turn a dark red in color.  She has chronic pain in the remaining leg up to her hip joint, and her physician has recommended its removal, which she has refused. 

Upon realizing those details we asked her if she would mind if we took over her finances to assure that she would be able to pay her bills and buy her critically needed medications.  She agreed willingly, and Sandra now coordinates all her bills.  She is now able to pay her medications and we were able to contact 4 insurance companies to reinstate her revoked policies due to non payment.  She was thrilled to get a $40 allowance, and understands there are several bills yet to be paid.  Her creditors have been understanding when the story has been related to them. 

Sadly, if Linda purchased a new item, her grandson and/or daughter would remove it from her unit to put it in the double wide home in Lillington.  That is amazing.  The existing possessions in her unit are dilapidated at best. We have arranged for the locks to be changed, as one of the grandsons has a key.  The grandson that came every month at the date the social security payment arrived to get money for his car payment and more to cover his expenses at the default of his grandmother’s bills, appeared once more the first of January, 2008 to repeat his usual request.  His grandmother told him she did not have any money, not even a checkbook.  He was angry and left, and is unlikely to return.

The Life Group had a Christmas Day social, and Linda was there to join a larger family. The Group took her on a shopping spree at the new Holly Springs super WalMart store.

Linda was taken her to her visit her mentally handicapped daughter in a Lillington rest home.  It was so touching to see the amazement and joy of her daughter, Rosalee, when she saw her mother for a second visit in less than 2 months.  Rosalee is so precious.  She clearly loves her mother so very deeply. 

Many needs, and we continue this journey with Linda.  Her health is poor, and we do not know how much longer she will live.  We hope, by getting her proper medications every day, it will be much longer.  She is such a good person.  She is someone everyone needs to realize is here in our community.   Certainly, she and others do not need that much, just a little bit of help, care and compassion.  That is our mission and outreach to our community at present.  It is a joy and an honor, but it is also a huge learning curve in human love.  Kress is the rock that has cared for Linda, and is Linda’s best friend.